The Goddess and Me
by equach
Summary: This is a comedic story involving me summoning Madokami/Madoka and my time having her living with me for a few days. This will not be a romance and this is before Rebellion! I do also want you to be aware that there "might" be some grammar and spelling errors.
1. Chapter 1

The Goddess and Me

A Puella Magi Madoka Magica Fanfiction

Note*This will contain spoilers from the anime and is based on the last episode and before the Rebellion story.

I ain't gonna be those guys that act all romantic and smoothing in this story. All I have to say is that my time with Madoka Kaname is, how should I say this, weird.

It all started in school when my friend had a book.

My friend: Hey Erik, I got this weird looking book and it has some strange stuff about entities and gods.

Me: That's neat Pedro, we can finally meet god and ask him about the meaning of life or about that rash I have on my upper leg.

Pedro: Well want to start the ritual now?

Me: F*&amp;% YEAH!

We did a small circle on the lunch tables and then wrote the name of the god that we want to summon on a small piece of paper, which is god. We and some other students whom thought that this is fun started chanting.

Everyone: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea

"Spongebob squarepants"

Absorbant and yellow and porous is he

"Spongebob Squarepants"

If nautical nonsense be something you wish

"Spongebob Squarepants"

Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish

"Spongebob Squarepants"

READY

Spongebob squarepants

Spongebob squarepants

Spongebob squarepants

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

Suddenly a thrust of lighting went into our ritual circle. Teachers just look and started screaming like idiots. The lunch lady looked with awe, thinking that this is a sign. A huge light burst through the cafeteria and then BOOM!

Floating on a lunch table appears a girl with long pink hair tied in a twin tail, golden eyes, and a long white dress. Pedro looked somewhat disappointed while I just looked at her moe cuteness. Pedro looked at the circle finding out that one the note that we use to summon the girl, I wrote goddess instead of god.

Everyone in the cafeteria treated this like nothing has happened. Some thought that this is stupid since there is an anime girl standing there. These people stayed ignorant even though there's a goddess here. Some are just too busy to look. Is Pedro and I the only ones surprised?

Pedro: You dirty pervert!

Me: What! A man can dream, but she looks younger than me so that's a down side. She looks about 11 or 12. I'm about 17 in my senior year.

The girl: I'm actually 14.

For the record, Madoka is an all knowing goddess so she can speak English.

Me: Wait the minute, you look familiar. The pink and moe reminds me of... MADOKA MAGICA! You must be Madoka Kaname!

Madoka: Yes I am, why did you summoned me?

Me: First off, I'm Erik and this is Pedro.

I then went on a long list of people and friends in the cafeteria including Stan the janitor. The rest will be mentioned later in this story, but not all of them because not all of them have an important role in this story.

Me: You were summoned here by a small accident, but since your here, maybe you can answer some of our questions.

Madoka: I don't have time for this, I must continue my mission on bringing hope and salvation to all magical girls.

Pedro: What is the color of my underwear?

Madoka: Blue. I must get going.

The goddess tries to teleport, but remembered something.

Madoka: NO! I forgot that I can't teleport. I need my ride.

The anime girl then takes out her cell phone and looked disappointed.

Madoka: I'm going to be here for a while so ask away.

Me: Great, is Pluto a moon rotating around Canada?

Madoka: That is just a really stupid question.

Me: Can you make it happen without any dire consequences?

Madoka: Fine.

Breaking news, Canadian scientists has dicovered that pluto isn't a planet nor dwarf planet, but a moon that rotates around Canada. It was proven to the fact that Pluto seems to be aline with Earth and Canada is in Earth. It was also proven that Pluto is facing Canada.

I saw that on my I-phone.

Madoka: I'm usually have some tolerance for people, but I'm worried that I might lose it with you.

Me: Fine I'll be serious. What is the meaning of life?

Madoka: Its up to you to decide. There are many ways to interpret life.

Pedro: That ain't an answer.

Me: If you take AP English language, that is literally the answer on some of the assignments.

Madoka: I wish Homura-chan is here, or Sayaka-chan.

Me: I want to meet them too!

Madoka: You only want to meet them because they are characters from one of your favorite anime.

Me: Pretty much.

The bell rang.

Me: Well time for class, want to go to Chemistry class with me?

Madoka: Sure I guess, but does Pedro want me to come with him?

Pedro: Nah, I don't know you at all.

Madoka just looked at him and just followed me to class. In chemistry, it was smoking and all the students from the previous class and the teacher looked high. Probably from an experiment gone wrong.

Everyone in the class looked dazed with red eyes. They all acted very lazy in a really funny way. It might be from some Iodine.

My chem teacher: Oh, this is good stuff.

The teacher then inhales the smokey air. Appearently they made a chemical that works like a drug. I wonder how he gets that stuff. Madoka uses her goddess powers to blow the air away and restore everyone back to normal.

Chem teacher: Oh what happened. I don't feel so good.

This happens to the others students. Everyone was dismissed for 3rd period and Madoka and me went to my AP Government class because I felt like it. Madoka and I just stood outside of the class, waiting for my period.

Madoka: American schools are a bit different than the one that I attended.

Me: Of course it is. You got all that advance technology while we have the basics.

Madoka: That's not what I meant, but you got a point. I meant on how your school is a bit strange.

Me: What are you talking about? Its totally normal. I seen your anime series and yours is a bit more extraodinary than mine.

Madoka: Whatever. I hope that your Goverment class is different.

Me: Let's get over this. After sixth period, I'm done.

Madoka: I thought this is fourth period.

Me: This school arranges the class time so that it won't get boring here.

During Class

Gov Teacher: One of the worst part of American history is not the slavery or racism. Its the.. uhh...Articles of the Confederation. Bleh. My tongue tasted one of you just from mentioning the name. Its that bad. I'm probably tasting you Hector.

Everyone, including me, laughed at the attitude of the teacher's speech. Madoka giggled a bit and her giggle was cute. Madoka was sitting on an empty seat, still in her Goddess attire. She's trying to get the feeling of what its like being in a classroom again.

Boy, did she thought wrong since the AP Gov teacher was known to be the best comedian in this school.

Gov Teacher: Remember that tomorrow is the chapter 3 exam.

As I left class, I decided to let Madoka tag along as I walk home because she had no place to go to in Santa Ana and she's part of one of my favorite anime. She could instantly get a hotel room, but she doesn't want to be lonely so I let her crash in my house.

The funny part of all this is that Madoka can teleport around the earth or around one realm, but not to her own realm without a certain portal. What a dumb limit? Gods should be able to do that type of stuff.

Everyone was looking at me and Madoka, but I just enjoyed the moment

Madoka: Are you going to study for the exam?

Me: Of course, along with my other big tests that my classes got for me. Unless you can work your magic in making me smarter.

Madoka: I don't think that's a good idea. You know what happens in cartoons when a character cheats their way in becoming smarter.

Me: Good point. I'll just study like I did since Monday.

Madoka: That's great. I might be able to be your studying partner help you out more.

Me: That's great, we can *( #)$*#$*#$#( #(# % or you can just do that making me smarter thing.

What I just said must never be mentioned in the public, but its nothing nasty. Its just so stupid that is beyond human. It has something to do with a Hippopotamus and talking dolphins. Best not get into details.

Madoka: No! I'm not going to be your Doraemon.

Me: Aw man, we could of have some fun adventures and create chaos into this world with explosions. Hah ha ha ha ha.

Madoka backed off a bit from what I said and shot me with lightning. Since this fanfiction is a comedy, I'm still alive.

Madoka: Whoops. I'm so sorry for that, but what is up with you? You don't seem so normal.

Me: Oh I'm just a funny guy.

...

Somewhere in Japan:

Homura Akemi felt something is wrong. It feels like Madoka is being harmed or harassed in some way. Could she be back from the other plane? Homura decides to take this chance to go take this chance to meet Madoka again.

Homura: Homu Homu.

...

At my house:

Me: Welcome to my crib.

My house looked plain, buts its pretty large with stairs, but nothing fancy like a rich guy. We then went to my room which looks semi-messy and neat at the same time.

Me: Here we have my room. Pretty neat huh.

Madoka: What is that smell?

Me: Its me and my room. Apparently I smell like my room, probably its from the shampoo that I used.

Madoka then uses her magic to get rid of the smell of my bedroom.

Me: Aw come on, I liked that smell.

Madoka: Sorry, its just that I'm not used to it.

Me: I know how you feel. Its like those streets with those stores that ain't like the ones we know. I'm not really used to the smell, but I did get used to the medicine smell.

Madoka: I never really been to those stores.

Me: Whatever, your hungry? We can't study with an empty stomach.

The goddess doesn't need to eat since she is a goddess, but she does so because she felt like it. She just waited at the kitchen table while I did all the cooking because I said so.

I might be no chef, but I made some good cup noodles for the both of us. Madoka seems to like it so that means I manage to get a goddess to like my cooking. Score one for me!

Madoka: These noodles are pretty good.

Me: Your welcome Madoka-chan.

Madoka: Just call me Madoka.

Me: But its just so fun calling you that.

Madoka: Please.

Me: Fine.

My sister came down stairs since she comes home earlier than me and goes to a different school. She looks at me and Madoka and says...

Sister: Who the f^^&amp; is she and your a pervert.

Me: What? She got no place to go. I'll just tell mom and dad about this and how she's a goddess and we'll be cool.

Well I called my parents and they agreed only if I can prove that god is in our house. I might have twisted my words a bit for rhetoical reasons.

I knew that some crap is going to happen if my parents saw Madoka. After eating, Madoka instantly clean everything up and I left to take a shower. The goddess and I then spend time studying for my exam and we do make a good study partners.

Madoka: How would you describe Dual Federalism?

Me: Its like a layer cake.

Madoka: Embyro/Embryon.

Me: Germ cell. I think I'm doing well on the word dissection. Bring me some Calculus.

Madoka: Derivative of cosx.

Me: -sin.x

Madoka: cscx

Me: -cscxcotx

Madoka: Back to government. What's the tenth amendment?

Me: Uh, something to do with any right that the national government doesn't have, it goes to the states.

Madoka: Close enough. Your doing pretty good and more easy to work with then Sayaka-chan.

Me: I'm not that dumb.

It was still around 6:58 and I'm not sleeping at this time. I seem to understand all the material. I may act like a mary sue, but unlike some people, I acutally pay attention in class and study.

Me: Want to go online and watch some anime?

Madoka: I guess.

We both use my laptop to watch some anime and I felt like watching some Dragonball z which Madoka find boring. This episode have Goku fighting Cell during the Cell Games.

Madoka: I kind of find this boring. Its just constant violence. Why can't these people talk things out peacefully?

Me: Because these people are awesome and bad ass. The series is just so cool with how all the characters being all powerful and beating the s*&amp;^ ut of each other like a boss.

Madoka: You sound like Kyoko-chan.

Me: For the record she's my favorite Puella Magi Madoka Magica character.

After the episode, I decided to do something else online. I showed the goddess my fan fiction that crosses her series with Dragonball z.

Madoka: YOU DID WHAT!

Me: Yeah, I kind of did it because of the whole gods thing. I know you can foretell the whole Rebellion story so this would be old news.

Madoka: I really don't like you making Goku-san fight Homura-chan.

Me: It was a awesome fight right.

Madoka: Not really. I'm not a big fan of fights.

Me: Geez, that what some girls say to me.

Madoka: Can we do something else?

Me: Like meeting my parents.

Madoka: What?

My parents are right behind us. They looked angry that I brought a girl home.

Dad: Who is this, your girlfriend?

Me: No. She's a goddess that I summon.

Mom: Did her parents allow this? You could get arrested.

Me: I told you she's a goddess. Watch as she uses her magic to get rid of my nasty rash on my upper leg.

I showed my parents my rash and everyone was disgusted.

Me: So Madoka, show me your wonders.

Madoka just did it because she does not want to look at it anymore. My parents are convience, but wonders why she's staying with me.

Me: Well mom and dad, she got no place to go and can't got back to her domain until her ride is here.

My parents looked confused and have no idea.

Me: She's a goddess and is waiting for her ride back to heaven or whatever you call her home.

My parents with a pleased tone: Ahh.

With that my parents left and agreed and Madoka and I were in my room alone.

Madoka: What now?

Me: Some more Dragon Ball, not Z. The first one. Very different.

We both watch a random episode of Dragon Ball and she was disgusted.

Madoka: I can't believe that the series was so nasty before.

Me: What are you talking about? I find it funny when Goku says that the balls are gone when really he discovers that Bulma has no $%^* ,but a #$ $# .

Madoka: Your a fun guy, but a bit weird.

Me: I know I am.

After watching some other anime, we both hit the hay and went try to get some shut eye.

Me: Hey Madoka, could you let me have a bad ass dream?

Madoka: We are not doing inception.

Me: Fine, but at least let me control my dream.

Madoka: Fine, but you better wake up early tomorrow.

When I shut my eyes, I dreamt that I was on a motorcycle, playing a children's card game.

Me: F*&amp; YEAH!

I spended my whole dream playing Yu-Gi-Oh on a motorcyle and it was awesome. I won't get into detail because this isn't a Yu-Gi-Oh fanfiction and it would be boring to some people to know about the duels I been in.

To be continued...

Note* Usually these types of stories have supernatural or strange things happen as the result of the unresponsible protagonist. However, its just that Madoka is not the type of person who would use her powers to harm people such as teachers and the main character is based on me and I would not be as careless as Nobita from Doraemon or Johnny from Johnny Test. I'm also trying my best to be not too redundant.

The later chapters will have crazy stuff happens because of her powers for reasons, but for now, you get character development and some getting to know each other. I'll think of something cool later.


	2. Chapter 2

The Goddess and Me Chapter 2

Note*Some stuff here is owned by nintendo.

It was after Period 5 in the beginning of the day that I have my quiz. Madoka is in her human form with her old school uniform, hair style and all. She used her goddess powers to disguise herself as a Japanese transfer student.

Madoka may not be in a goddess form, but her pink hair and uniform like clothes did show a lot of attention. Some students even question about her hair color while others just dismiss it as her dyeing her hair. Some people dye their hair in my school so it wasn't much of a big deal after the first class.

Madoka: People here are more rude. At my old school, everyone often say nice things about each others hair. Some people have blond hair or blue hair. Its even their natural hair color.

Me: Well, multicolored hair not common in this neighborhood or this country. Except for the blond, thats pretty normal.

The strange part about heading to Per. 1 was that a helicopter trashed the place. How did that happen? Well, it was this crazy idea I had when I woke up to let my AP English teacher own a helicopter and let him have an extreme morning.

Madoka: What?

Me: My English teacher always wanted a helicopter. I thought that it would nice if you can use your magic to make it so. [Yawn]

Madoka: If it were to benefit someone, I guess I'll do it.

Me: Also, let my teacher have an epic morning with it too.

Madoka: What do you mean by 'epic morning'?

In an instant at my AP Teacher woke up seeing a helicopter in his front yard. He went out with his sleeping clothes to observe it and went inside. Suddenly, the doors locked and the helicopter started working by itself.

It started flying and my teacher struggled to control it. It flew started piercing through the air, faster than what a regular helicopter can do. Suddenly the military came to go after my teacher.

Military guy: Sir, please land your helicoptor.

My teacher tries, but with no success. He ended up shooting them with missles which was not intentional. Then an army of Kaiju(Giant Monsters) appeared and my teacher accidently activated the lasers that killed off all of the Kaiju. The whole thing was like two hours I think and is like Pacific Rim or Godzilla.

Since my teacher isn't a train pilot, he ends up crashing into his classroom. Only a side of it. Everything else looks somewhat okay, but the classroom still had some damages.

That's where me and Madoka comes in. Along with some students, we enter the room, we see the rubble and disaster in the classroom. My teacher manages to get out of the helicopter by punching it.

English Teacher in a tired out tone: Alright class, we have a quiz today.

He thens falls down unconscious.

...

Everything else was a breeze until period 3 chemistry with the test.

Chemistry Teacher: Today I need you to know about lab safety and not touch the acid.

A student ends up touching some acid and burns her hand.

Chemistry Teacher: What did I tell you? Now we need to call 911 for help.

Madoka starts feeling bad for the girl so she help fix the acid damage to her hand, but that didn't stop 911 from coming and taking her away. The Goddess was too late for that.

Chemistry Teacher: Now we will start on the real experiment. First we...

The Chemistry accidently slipped on a nuclear puddle and got some strange acid on him. It was all thanks to some jerk in class that did it.

All I did was whisper to Madoka saying that...

Me: Could you give him spider powers? It would be cool ya know.

Madoka was not listening and just did it because she was panicing about the acid on the teacher. At least we have a real life Spider-man.

Suddenly the teacher got up all fine and was surprised that it was all okay. He held onto a desk, but it ended up sticking to it. He tries to get if off, but accidently got his sticky spider hands onto his face. He was stumbling back blindly as he ended up falling into more dangerous chemicals.

He ended up going to the hospital and chemistry class was dismissed again. Madoka used her powers to put him back to normal, but he was off to a better place. No its not death, its the hospital and he gets to meet the nurses.

I blame Willy Wonka for this.

Video Production class was nothing much except...

Me: I'm recording my own music video! E-QUACH IS IN THE HOUSE!

Madoka is in the background as a DJ with some of my classmates using newer equipment. People who are doing nothing join in the video with me.

My song: Just going to school, playing children card games.

All those ladies here want to #$# $# $ #$!

And a # #$ %%^%$&amp;^%$!

Motel, Hotel, Intel, Microsoft.

Let me tell you something b*&amp;*#, I just don't f&amp;^*in care!

I ain't rhyming anymore cuz just rap whatever I want!

The stuff I'm saying is full of s$%^ anyways!

...

The dubstep was too powerful that the spotlight broke and fell off the celling. It ended up landing on my teacher.

Me: Oh 'god', will you be alright?

Ms.B: My last words to you is that your music video was amazing and also...

Me: Yes.

Ms. B: I'm suddenly okay.

The teacher surprisingly got up all fine after Madoka healed her. Everyone was shocked on how the teacher just gets up and act as if nothing has happen.

Ms. B: How did this happen? I was dying for one minute and the next I was all okay.

Me: Thank the new transfer student since she's magical.

Madoka begins to feel nervous: Uh, your welcome, and Erik, would you not show me off to people?

After all of that, it was lunch time and Madoka was pretty upset with me.

Madoka: Everything I do ends up hurting your teachers.

Me: Its not completely your fault. I mean, Willy Wonka was responsible for that chemical spill that Mr. H fell onto. Everything else was my fault.

Yes, the actual Willy Wonka from that movie did it and did not get arrested.

Madoka: Can we spend the rest of the school day normally?

Me: No promises.

Madoka: Erik, please. I don't want anyone else get hurt. We can do all of that fun goddess stuff after school.

Me: Meep.

Madoka: I'll take that as a yes.

Before math class started or at the end of lunch, we saw my teacher in depression since the Angels lost their game last night. I try to ask Madoka is she can do anything, but she says...

Madoka: No, not this time!

Me: But why?

Madoka: Remember your English, Video Production and Chem class.

Me: Everyone makes mistakes.

Madoka: You promised that we are going to have a normal day of school today, whether you like it or not.

Me: I said meep.

Madoka: I took that as a yes.

Me: It wasn't a yes or a no, it was a meep.

Madoka: I'm not going to use my godly powers because people will get hurt. Do you want that?

Me: Fine, I'll stop nagging you until after school. How's that?

Madoka: Okay.

My friend Joey appears out of nowhere: So what are you two talking about.

Madoka: Nothing.

Juan: Erik, is that your new girlfriend? Don't lie to me.

Hector, another friend that's got involved: Did I hear someone having a girlfriend.

Me: Hell yeah mother f*&amp;#ers. Madoka and I are getting started.

Madoka blushed: Don't lie Erik. We are not in a relationship.

Me: Damn it.

Joey: Knew it.

Erik: Forever alone buddies.

Joey and Hector: Forever alone buddies.

We all did a fist bump. I did see Madoka being shocked about how we can have pride in lonliness. She was sadden that there was ever a thing called forever alone.

Madoka: Don't you find it sad to be forever alone?

Me: It sucks not having girlfriends, but its best to have friends at least. I'm not totally alone, just don't have a date.

Joey: I forgot that I actually do have a girlfriend.

Me: Shut up.

Madoka continued to not use her powers for the rest of the school day to avoid more problems and injuries. I even try to control myself to not ask her to do anything even though I want some spice in my average life.

...

Somewhere afar in a plane, a raven-hair girl sat at a first class seat in an airplane.

Flight Attendant: More strange purple Gatorade Ms. Akemi.

Homura: Yes please.

The Flight Attendant pour some of that strange Gatorade into the empty cup. This was no ordinary plane. Homura looked outside and saw the plane going through a vortex to my dimension. How she got a ticket to a plane like this remains a mystery? Our best guest is that Doctor Who was involved.

Homura smiled that she was not only be able to travel through dimensions, but also get to see Madoka again. Homura drank as she gazed at the streaming inner part of the vortex.

Homura: Homu Homu.

...

Schools out, now time for crazy things to happen. We start during my video game club.

Me: This here is video game club. The place I go to every after school on Mondays and Fridays.

Madoka: A club like that exist?

Anthony, a friend of mine in the club: Oh hey, your new here?

Madoka: Yes.

Anthony: Well, hi, my name is Anthony. You must be?

Madoka: Madoka Kaname.

Anthony: Are you like Japanese or something?

Madoka: Yes I'm Japanese.

Me: And a Goddess.

Madoka: Erik!

Erik: I got an idea about what we can do today. How about a real life Super Smash Bros. battle?

Madoka: Huh.

Me: Yeah, you can use your magic to set everything up for a crazy Super Smash Bros. fight and not let us die or seriously injured.

Madoka: I think that idea is sort of fun. Its decided, I will create a real Super Smash Bros. battle and will try my best to make it be like the game and no one get seriusly hurt or dies.

Me: Who wants to join?

Everyone in the club wants to join the fight. First guys playing are me, Madoka, Anthony, and another friend of mine named Albert. I might be a geek, but I'm geek with friends for the record. I know a lot of people.

The stage was set in the battle field from Smash Bros. we all get ready for battle.

Albert: Question, what's our move set?

Me: Whatever you want.

I started punching Antonio over and over again.

Anthony: Oh f*#$ man, quit the spamming.

Me: NEVER!

Albert uses a sword while Madoka uses her godly bow. She shot an arrow and Albert dodged it quickly because of video game logic. Albert than lands a big slash, sending Madoka off the stage. Even though Madoka is a goddess, Albert is good at playing Smash Bros.

Albert: OHHHH! You got owned.

Finally I stop spamming and actually started fight with a combonation of punches and sword slashes. Anthony was able to dodge and annoy he hell out of me.

Me: Damn it Daddy, why you no die?

Anthony: Because f*&amp;^ you.

I called him Daddy because that's his nickname in Smash Bros. I have no idea why, but I seen weirder and funnier names.

I was finally was able to do the most ultimate move which is the...

Me: FALCON PUNCH!

Sadly I missed Anthony and got a bomb killing everyone on stage. Luckily Madoka is safe because she has just came back and is invulnerable temporary. Everyone was back on a platform and continued to slaughter each other.

I manage to get a hammer and started pounding everyone in my way. Three points for me. Finally the smash ball appears and we all try to reach for it. I noticed that Madoka was holding back, but I didn't mind. I used some random sword to reach the smash ball, but Anthony had a gun and shot it.

Looks like we have to see it for ourselves about what would Anthony's special would be like. Apparently, its has butt-naked angels.

Me: Holy s*#$, its the butt-naked angels.

Albert: Your copying Pit's special.

Madoka: Why do you guys call it that? They are called Centurions.

Albert and I started laughing cause there's butt-naked angels after us. They were all going after us and Madoka was too serious the whole time as she dodged while we get our asses kicked. At least none of us dies.

Anthony then got an AK-47 and started shooting randomly. I got some sort of blaster from Halo and started shooting and occasionally use my sword if I got near to someone. Albert just duel wield some guns and this is becoming a first person shooter game. At least Madoka still uses her bow and arrow.

I was damage so much that I flew off the stage and everyone else was brawling it out.

Me as I appear back on the stage: F#$% you all. Your all are f*&amp;^ing dead!

I got back and started f#$%ing everyone with my f#$%ing sword. I was all like a Samurai and s#$%. Yeah I'm cursing a lot, but that's just I feel in battle. I started b#$%^ slapping everyone and I got shanked by Albert. Everyone got an arrow to the knee by Madoka and my friends and I said together.

My friends and me: F#%*!

Another smash ball appears and Madoka got it with her bow and arrow. She shot in the air and it rained down a storm of arrows.

My friends and me: AHHHHHHHHH!

We all got KO'd and Madoka won. Everything got turned back to normal.

Madoka: That was pretty fun.

Albert: Tell me about it.

After that, more people in the club join in more of these battles and it was epic.

...

Note*Sorry I took so long, had some set backs and school. Hope you like this chapter and also Homura will come soon.


	3. Chapter 3

The Goddess and Me

Chapter 3

Note* I may want to warn you all that the reason why I have been slow at submitting is due to my heavy schedule and school work. I know that I'm making excuses, but its true. Also this chapter will feature some characters that I do not own at all.

The weekend has begun as Madoka and I woke up to a beautiful Saturday morning. My parents and sister are still asleep so I prepared breakfast for the both Madoka and myself. I served some random bread s*&amp;% to Madoka and ate some of mine. She doesn't like it.

Madoka: Really? That's all we have.

Me: I have you know that I am not as professional of a chef that I should be.

Madoka: Let me handle this.

In an instant, the table is filled with plates of eggs and toast. I didn't care, but just ate it because its better than whatever s*** that I had. Though suddenly I felt something was missing.

Madoka: Erik, what's wrong?

Me: Oh god.

Madoka: What?

Me: I just realize...

Madoka: Yes.

Me: That there aren't any more Saturday morning cartoons!

Madoka: Huh.

Me: They were part of my childhood and now there gone. I don't have cable so that I won't be able to watch other cartoon channel. Sure I can watch some online, but it won't have that magical feeling that I feel as a kid.

Madoka: I never really watch any as a kid.

Me: I have an idea. How about you make some door that lets us go into these old cartoons? That way we can experience the nostalgia feeling along with some twist to it.

Madoka: I guess it would be fun.

Me: Great, now lets wreck some Saturday morning cartoons on Vortexx or some 4kids shows.

Madoka: Wait, those cartoons.

Me: Yeah, some are pretty bad anime English dubs while others are fun cartoons, but I think it would be funny if I made some changes.

Madoka: Suit yourself.

Madoka created a door that opens to another world.

Me: Wait if you can do that, then why don't you open a portal that will bring you home?

Madoka: A cartoon world is easier to open than a world in another plane.

Me: Whatever.

We then entered the door that would lead us to another world or an animated world.

Note* The following will have shows owned by whoever owns the Vortexx block.

First off, Dragonball z Kai.

Madoka and I landed to the episode where Gohan fights Cell with the big Kamehameha duel.

Madoka: Is this Dragonball Z?

Me: No, its the kai version. A remake of the original. For some reason it doesn't get the same feel as the original.

Madoka: Bummer. Never got into it anyways.

Me: Your right. This was my favorite part of the anime, but I don't feel the same excitement like the original.

Vegeta: What the f*&amp;$ did you just say?

Yes my friends, Vegeta just talked to me. He glared at me with anger. Madoka and I just staggered back a bit.

Me: Uh, I said that this part isn't as exciting as the original.

Vegeta: Part? The f*&amp;% are you talking about?

Madoka: I thought this was a kids show.

Me: This whole thing is a fan fiction made by some idiot. He probably made Vegeta acts similar to the one in the Abridged series.

Vegeta: Answer me fools!

Me: The world you know is a lie. This world is just an anime.

Cell, the guy fighting Gohan looks back at me and seems interested. I'm surprised that someone like him would take give me some acknowledgement.

Cell: Such wise words of wisdom.

Gohan took this chance to power up his Kamehameha and kills Cell while he was distracted. I just looked surprised about the whole thing and asked Madoka if we could leave, which she quickly agrees and we left the place.

We both ended up back to my house exhausted even though it was only a few minutes. The magical door that lead us to the Dragonball Z Kai unverse. Madoka looked really sweaty from the confrontion of Vegeta.

Madoka: That was really scary.

Me: Well since you have a door that can teleport us anywhere, but your godly world, let's go traveling!

Madoka: That would be nice. Maybe we should go to Paris.

Me: Yeah, lets go to France during the French Revolution and see all the violence.

Madoka: That's not what I meant.

Me: It would be fun. We still get to see all the good stuff about France, only with some shooting and some assassins from Assassin's Creed.

Madoka: I doubt that that happened.

Me: I was joking. Of course there won't be any assassins like that. Its only a video game, though it would be cool if there were some.

Madoka: I hope not.

Right where we were about to travel to France using Madoka's magical door, a big explosion happen and a phone booth appeared.

Madoka: Oh no, not another Doctor Who reference.

No its not, its something else. The phone booth opens, revealing two teenagers. They look like rock fans and the sight of them makes you think that they are idiots. One of them is a blond with a white shirt and a jacket tied to his waist. The other one has medium or long black hair with a black vest, a white t-shirt, and an orange jacket tied on his waist.

The blond one: I'm Bill S. Preston Esquire.

The Black haired one: And I'm Ted Theodore Logan.

Both of them: And we are Wyld Stallyns!

The two of them then played their air guitar. I was amazed about these guys since its freakin Bill and Ted. Madoka doesn't seem to like them since her face showed some disgust.

Me: So dudes, how come you came to my house?

Ted: Well Rufus manage to modified our time machine to so that we can travel through dimensions.

Bill: Ted, these people don't know whose Rufus is.

Me: Oh I know Rufus because I watch your movie.

Bill and Ted: No way.

Me: Yes way.

Bill and Ted: No way.

Me: Yes way.

Madoka: Can we please stop?

Bill: I can't believe that they made a movie about us.

Madoka: I wanted to tell you that in this world, your journeys have been just a movie.

Ted: Bill, I don't think we're in San Dimas anymore.

Bill: I don't think we're in our world or timeline.

Both of them: Bogus.

My parents and sister ran down stairs to see what's up, but they fainted at the sight at the whole situation.

Me: So what brings you two here?

Bill: Well, we are trying to help this kid's report on the French Revolution and got this guy to help us.

In the phone booth appears a man wearing fancy French clothes and a blue hooded coat. He started speaking French and it sounded like he was confused.

Me: I don't play much video games except for the Nintendo ones, but you got an assassin from the Assassin's Creed series.

Bill: This guy is from a video game. Dude, I thought that he was from this world.

Me: No way.

Bill: Yes way.

Me: No way.

Ted: Yes way.

Madoka: You mean that this man is from this world and it could be that a video game depiction of history is really accurate.

Bill and Ted just shurgged.

Me: Cool. If that's the case, history got more cooler.

Bill: Really.

Bill and Ted: Excellent. (They play their air guitar.)

Ted: I know right. This guy was all jumping on walls, climbing and doing all kinds of stuff. We went up to him if he knows about Napoleon and the French Revolution.

Bill: It seems that he knows so we took him and ended up in your house for some reason.

We see Arno Dorian, that's his name in the game, looking around in confusion. He saw my television set and pokes it.

Madoka: We need to bring him back. The future may be too much for him to handle.

Arno then speaks more French and tries to open the window, but can't get out because of the black fence in from of it.

Madoka then tries to use her powers to make him go back to where he belongs, but a girl leap through a portal and almost crashed into Madoka. Since Madoka can see the future, she dodges, but doesn't realize that doing so make her a target against the Power Rangers Time Force.

The rangers shot their lasers and it got Madoka. I just freaked out when she got knocked out.

Me: Oh god.

Red Time Force Ranger: Now I need all of you time travelers in the house to please turn yourself in.

Suddenly Arno jumped out of the window and assassinate them all those rangers with some awesome blows. He started running to find some sense of direction while screaming random French. This is going to be like that Billy and Mandy episode when Fred Flintstone appears as a special guest.

Me: With Madoka out of commission, we can't just poof them away anymore.

I then notice the girl just just leaped through time.

Me: You must be Makoto Konno from that movie right. What's is called? Oh yeah. The Girl Who Leaped Through Time.

The girl started to speak some Japanese that I clearly don't understand.

Bill went up to the girl and said...

Bill: Its like dust in the wind. Dude.

He does this with some gestures and Makoto slaps him. Suddenly the Time Force Rangers appear in my living room again, but this time they are speaking Japanese.

Me: Wait, these aren't the our Power Rangers. These people are part of the Super Sentai series.

Ted: What's that dude?

Me: Japanese Power Rangers. They came first and America took some of their footage to make the show that we have today.

Ted: That is most utterly heinous.

Suddenly Bill just came out of the phonebooth with some more assassins.

Bill: Hey dudes, I manage to get more assassins that will help us. Rufus even gave us some translator thingy that lets us talk to some of them. I even have one for the Japanses chick.

And so the assassin when up against the Super Sentai team and sucessfully assassinate them all. It was glorious.

Bill toss me the translater and I gave it to Makoto and she now can speak and understand English. Then I laid Madoka on my couch, but left my parents on the ground.

Makoto: Okay, I'm confuse with all of this. How come I'm here while I'm suppose to be in my house trying not to be late to school again.

Me: I have no idea. Its as if time travelers are being transported directly to my house for some reason.

A voice: Oh I can explain all of this.

Bill: Dude, its Conan O'Brien.

Doctor Who: I am the Doctor.

Ted: Doctor who?

Doctor Who: Exactly.

Me: Great, we're doing a Doctor Who references and cameos.

Doctor Who: I would like to explain how all of this is happening. You see, every time traveler suddenly has their time machine being attracted to some supernatural force like a magnet. I believe that that specific magnet is that pink haired girl on the couch.

Ted: Whoa.

Me: That's great, now will you wait here in a closet until this is all over. I just think having you will complicate things.

Doctor Who: I completely understand. I'll have to wait for the next person who will make a fanfiction about me.

The doctor then heads to a random room that has a closet.

Me: Where were we? Oh yeah. What's the plan?

Bill: Its obvious that we will get the dude with these dudes.

He was referring to the assassins. Bill manage to get Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad, Ezio Auditore, Connor Kenway, and Edward Kenway. Oh I almost forgot about them, they'll have some speaking lines soon. And thanks to the translaters, Ezio can speak English too.

Makoto: I might not be a time traveling expert, but isn't that a bad idea.

Ted: This would actually be the coolest idea we ever made.

Edward Kenway: So you lads want us to go after this assassin lost in this place.

Me: Exactly.

Connor: Then we must hurry.

Me: Yeah, about that, this is a different time era so you might need our help to guide you all.

Ezio: What is this flat box?

Oh god Ezio and Altair is looking on my televisions set. This cliche is getting old.

Me: Its a television set. An entertainment device.

Ezio and Altair: What?

Ted: This is T.V.

The two assassins are more confused. The looked at each other and notice something.

Ezio: It can't be. Your suppose to be dead long time ago.

Altair: What do you mean?

Me: What he's saying is that at his timeline, your dead.

Altair just looked shocked and Makoto slaps him.

Makoto: We have some serious buisness to settle with, remember.

Me: Okay lets go.

I then grab Madoka's portal door or I should call it the Everywhere door because I think that it may help a bit.

...

Well since the whole space time continuum crap has to come in play. Here what happens to Homura.

The raven haired girl is now at an airport in Los Angeles. She walked out of the place and finds a taxi. When she waves her hand, she notices that her left hand is becoming tranparent.

Homura: No, how is this possible? Could it have something to do with this world?

The taxi driver came by and picked Homura up. Homura hopes that her trip is worth her existance. The Taxi Driver looks back at Homura and says.

Taxi Driver: Say little girl, where are your parents?

Homura: I'm visiting them.

Homura knows English because of the influence of her soul gem. She used it so that the taxi driver can understand her.

Taxi Driver: By yourself.

Homura: My, uh, Aunt in Japan trust me to go alone.

Taxi Driver: I see.

Homura only thought right now is to find Madoka and her transparent arms. She looked at it again and saw that both of her arms and legs are becoming transparent. She must hurry.

...

Well as we prepare to go after the French Assassains, our own assassins just ditched us and started acting bad ass as they climbed on walls and all that fun stuff.

Me: They got it all handled.

Makoto: You let a bunch of killers loose in the neighborhood. They could cause major trouble.

Ted: Babe, you worry too much.

Makoto: Don't you dare call me babe!

Me: As I said before, they got it.

...

They don't got it because they were busy being chased by the police for climbing on people's roofs. You all won't get to see how awesome this chase because I don't have the budget for the CGI graphics and all without Madoka's help. You do however get to know what could have happened later.

...

Me: As I was saying, lets do our part now.

We were about to go searching, but found the assassin that we wanted to find in the nearest Stater Bros. I went up to him as he was choosing what he should drink and put the translater on him.

Makoto: We found him, I think since he had that assassin hood.

Both Bill and Ted: Excellent! (Play their air guitar)

Arno: The hell!

Bill: Don't worry dude, its only us.

Arno: You two. You're the fools who brought me to this weird place to begin with.

Ted: Dude, we just needed you help on helping this kid's report on Napolean and all.

Arno: For the record, I know him, but not everything.

Bill: Not even how he dies.

Arno: You know about that?

Makoto: Anyways, we need you to go back to where you belong.

Arno: Right. Now how am I suppose to do that?

Me: I have a solution.

I use the Everywhere door that I previously had and opening it, hoping that it would lead to Arno's home, but instead I saw Madoka's upset face. She wasn't angry, but somewhat worried and sad at the same time. Behind her were a bunch of people that you saw in some movies. You guess that they are totally time travelers.

Madoka: Erik, what happened? I woke up seeing a bunch of time travelers.

Me: Well glad that you woke up.

Marty: Hey Doc, what happened?

Doctor Brown: You see Marty, that pink haired girl must be attracting every time traveler to her. She might have some sort of energy source that would make her become a living magnet. If only there's a way to fix this.

Me: I have a solution.

Makoto: Argh.

Me: We need to bring this guy home.

I was referring to Arno.

Mr. Peabody: That might restore the space time continuum and we can get home.

Sherman: That's great Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody: Quiet you.

Madoka then works her magic bringing Arno home and the other assassins that were being chased too. How does she know that the cops were after them? She's a goddess.

...

The assassins are back in their time era, removing their translaters if they had any and use their knowledge of the modern era. They only know these stuff because they ran by it.

Altair tries to immitate the pop music, but only got people booing him because he can't sing. However, he can dance.

Ezio tries to make pizza and was horrible at it.

Connor Kenway tires to create hamburgers out of anything, but cows. It tasted good.

Edward Kenway manage to achieve something that Altair couldn't. He can sing and his song became one of the most legendary pirates songs ever. Yes, my friends. He copied the Smosh Assassin's Creed 4 Rock Anthem.

Edward and his crew: Yo ho Yo ho

A pirate's life for me

Yo ho yo ho

Murdering fools for free.

That is also how the song was made by Smosh which manage to get in the hands of the lyrics that ends up in Kenway's hands and yadda yadda yadda. Where did the song come from? This time traveling crap is hurting my head.

Arno tries to invent television and people think he's crazy.

...

Madoka: Now that's settled, I should turn off my Anti-time traveler switch in my goddess dress.

Madoka turns into her goddess form and peaked inside her dress and turns off a button. Everyone was dumbfounded that she could do just that.

Madoka: I only had that switch because its for people like the Doctor or Dr. Rick Sanchez if he tries to time travel.

Everyone then goes back to where they belong. Makoto took off her translater and spoke some angry Japanese and leap into a portal. Well we don't get to know her much, but it was fun knowing her.

As Bill and Ted leave, they gave some few words before they depart back home.

Bill: It was cool meeting you dudes.

Me: Likewise.

Madoka: Please don't get yourself in trouble in the future.

Ted: Whatever.

Both of them: Catch ya later dudes!

The duo then left. Madoka turned back into a normal girl, if you can call having pink hair normal, and sat at my couch. I was pretty happy for what I delt with today even though it seemed rushed. Thanks a lot writer, you suck at what you do.

Even though it happened all too quickly, it was pretty intense and all. Though there might be the problem with the huge amount of crossovers.

Me: I hope that later chapters would be better than this.

Madoka: Agreed, and I think that this whole thing is my fault.

Me: Is it because of the whole switch thing?

Madoka: A huh. None of this would have happen if I never accidently pushed it. Though I don't remember doing so. In fact, I never went back into my goddess form since Thursday.

Me: Then who did it.

Outside of my house, there was a man on a roof looking. He was in a pink jumpsuit like costume and drank some Mountain Dew.

Me: Well at least we didn't mess up the past a lot.

I look outside and saw an ad for pet platypuses. I then heard a man listening to the radio that declared that they will play the national anthem, but it was the Spongebob Squarepants theme song.

Me: I think that we made better changes in the past.

...

Meanwhile, Homura is now completely transparent and fell off the taxi because of that. The taxi driver now thinks that his job is haunted as he screamed the whole way.

Homura: Not now! Madoka! Where are you?!

Homura ran and ran. Worrying about dissappearing without ever seeing Madoka again. However, since I saved the day, Homura then solidfied again. Homura looked at her hands and saw that she is no longer see through.

The raven haired girl presumed that someone messed with the past and manage to fix it.

Homura: Now to find Madoka.

Homura notices something different. Her voice gotten deeper and it made her sound really stupid. Homura then gave a big 'no' and tries fix this with her soul gem. It didn't work.

Homura: I think I need a doctor.

The magical girl knows that Madoka won't recognize her with that voice. She needs to fix this as soon as possible.

...

For the record, Doctor Who is still in my closet.

Doctor Who: Hello. Is it over? Uh bugger.

...

End of Chapter 3.

Note* Man this one was tricky. I know that this one may seem rushed, but I tried my best on it. Also, I added the whole crossover thing because I most recently got interested in the story of the Assassin's Creed series and just wanted to add a funny twist to it with time travelers.


	4. Chapter 4

The Goddess and Me

Chapter 4

It was raining on a Sunday. Madoka looked upset and I just played Super Smash Bros. on the 3DS. Madoka thought about changing the weather, but it might be a bad idea. Though I asked Madoka a question.

Me: Hey Madoka.

Madoka: Yes.

Me: With all the power that you have and how you sometimes us it at our advantage, don't you think that there is some rich guy out there who might be interested in us?

Madoka: Since I can predict the future, I believe so and he will appear right about... now.

Suddenly a helicopter flew by my house and tear up the wall. A boy that is about 13 appeared before me. He wore a buisness suit and has geled hair. His sunglasses just makes him look silly instead of mature. He walked down and got close to Madoka.

The rich boy: So you must be this so called goddess that I heard of. I've read books and done my research. Now that I found you, I will make you mine.

Madoka: No!

The boy prepared some sort of ritual and it restrained Madoka preventing her from using some her powers. That sucks, but I am not that stupid to just stand there and let that happen like some people that I know of.

Me: Madoka! You should've have done something to prevented this to begin with.

Madoka: I got distracted.

Me: Just give me a f*&amp;#in gun!

Madoka instead gave me a Master Sword. Whatever. I like Zelda. I slashed the kid in the back and then he stopped his ritual and used his hand to hand combat against. I know that he is younger than me, but he can handle it.

Me slashing: You... Fag-got!

The boy then slaps me lightly and it was painful. It was overbearing. Madoka was somewhat freed and shot an arrow that knocked him out, but not kill him. Madoka then went up to the kid and gave him to his minions. The helicopter left.

Madoka cleaned up the place and something tells me that it won't be the last time I will ever see that guy. Why did he went after us? Well sadly the writer of this fanfiction is having a brain fart thus making him run out of ideas for the story so whatever.

Madoka: I know he'll come back.

Me: Next time we see him, we'll kill him.

Madoka: We shouldn't kill him. Its wrong.

Me: Well if this fan fiction going to be those type of stories where we have to face him in ever chapter then we will have people bitch about us like they did to Phineas and Ferb.

Madoka: There has to be another way. I could change his mind, but that's just as wrong too. I need to think of a way to not kill or harm the boy in anyway.

Me: How about we make this bet? If the kid is plans to attack us again and do something as stupid as taking over the world, I will take him out.

Madoka: I understand. Even though I can predict the future, I see the boy fated for a tragic end. Though he seems to be the type of person that you will never feel bad for.

Me: We might have to wait then.

I really don't want to deal with the redundant crap that might come up soon with a kid having his parents dead or tragic past and blah blah blah. Writer! Make something new.

Just as I predicted, the kid returns while I was watching an episode of Kill la Kill. That anime was awesome! Though Madoka hated the nude scenes which I also kind of agree with her. Never the less, it was awesome.

Rich boy: Greetings fools, I am Sir Jasper A. Phagod the X and I am here to collect your goddess.

Me: Okay just cut the crap and tell me what's your evil plan.

Jasper: Well I was going to summon your goddess here so that I can change the world in my image, but my book of gods was taken from me by some thief and sold it somewhere. Santa Ana seems to be where the book is at.

Me: When you mean by in your own image, you meant you ruling the world as a god and in order to do so you need to absorb Madoka.

Jasper: Yes.

Me: You know, some people would let you live and you will appear again over and over. We could make a show about that with what? Three seasons perhaps. Well, I'm not like some people.

Suddenly a bunch of chains wrapped around the boy and a bunch of guns appear out of nowhere shooting the boy to death. I'm not doing all of this so I didn't kill him. A bunch of swords slash the boy into pieces. Some may find this glorious, while others may find it creepy.

You may say that this is totally underdeveloped, but at least I saved your time and mines from dealing with this jerk for like a chapters.

Madoka came and looked at the mess. She was disgusted and was shocked to see the remains of the jerk. She held up her hand up to her mouth and looked at me. She then said.

Madoka: Is... this why you asked me for all that... metal stuff?!

Me: Yeah.

Madoka: Why did you kill him?!

Me: He was going to take over the world and it was going to drag on. I don't want that guy to be my nemesis. For the record, I didn't do anything, the weapons did that on their own.

Madoka: Murdering is not always the answer. In fact, I'm a goddess for crying out loud. I can alter the guy's memories to stop him from doing anything bad.

Me: Then why didn't you do it to begin with.

Madoka: I got distracted.

Me: You know for a goddess, you often forget to do something consistant.

Madoka: Its not easy being me and I only started this job for about six to seven months already.

Madoka then revives Jasper with no memory about what happened and teleported him home.

Me: Well right now, is there anyone coming this way to get you?

Madoka: Yeah.

A bunch of obvious evil guys then came into my house all together. I simply stared at them and said.

Me: How many of you guys are here to absorb Madoka's powers?

All of them raised their hands.

Me: Now how many of you have some sort of sad background story?

All of them raised their hands.

Me: Madoka, sick them.

Madoka then concentrated and all the bad guys had forgotten about why they came to my house and left.

Me: Now wasn't that too hard.

Madoka: You think being a god is easy, why don't you try it?

Me: I would gladly.

Madoka: If you did have powers then what will you do?

Me: Have Hell on Earth 2015.

Madoka: What?

Me: Oh its just an epic name for an epic party that is annual for epic proportions and its one of the most epic parties ever with only epic people being invited.

Madoka: What sort of food will you provide?

Me: A bunch of everything.

Madoka: Bigger than I thought. Next, say you have a supernatural disaster in the universe, what will you do?

Me: Be all like "I'm one big mother f*#$er and you will do as I say." and all of that crap will be over.

Madoka: It doesn't work that way.

Me: Not with that attitude.

Madoka: Not with any attitude.

Me: Whose the one who let you stay until you can go home?

Madoka has lost. She just sat on the couch and looked really upset. I really did it this time. I screw up my chance to make her love me.

Me: Madoka, baby. I'm sorry. Its just that I just thought that some of the crap that we being through could be fixed easily with your powers.

Madoka: Erik, remember what Spiderman said?

Me: Yeah. "With great power, comes great responsibility."

Madoka: Being me is fun and all, but you have to be careful. You might even destroy the universe.

Me: I can't believe that I forgot about that line for a while.

Madoka: I know that its a drag, but I have to not use my powers a lot.

Me: Fine, but a mundane life is just so boring.

Madoka: Everything we have been doing in this fanfiction is either stupid or boring.

Me: Fine, we won't have any killing involve. At least let me shoot someone if we were to get into those situations where we have to have a fight.

Madoka: Fine.

Well that settles it. My parents aren't home and my sister is asleep so there wasn't any big problems in the house. Madoka just helped clean up the whole mess and we both spend the rest of the Sunday watching anime.

Madoka seem to be worried even though there a funny moment in the episdoe we watched. What could it mean? Does Cthulhu have something to do with it? All I know is that Madoka can sense something f*%^ up coming this way in the future.

For now, I'll wish for a Pokemon for a pet in the next chapter.

...

Well currently, Homura is at a clinic getting ready for her surgury. The doctor for some reason wore a mask and a black cloak like the middle ages during the Black Plague.

Doctor: I assure you Miss. Akemi that I will cure you of the disease.

Homura: I only came to have my voice fixed.

Doctor: Could be a symptom I suppose? Let the operation commence.

The doctor started to mutilate Homura's throat and started to give the magical girl a shot. It was so nasty that I can't describe it. After a while, the Doctor is done.

Doctor: I hope you feel better Miss. Akemi.

Homura: No, you made my voice worse.

Homura's voice now sound like a British gentleman.

Doctor: Oh no! You see to be uncurable.

Well I wanted to tell you all that the Doctor was literally the Plague Doctor or SCP-049. Yeah ironic huh.

Plague Doctor: Miss. Akemi, as you leave, don't spread your disease to the ones that are cured.

Homura walked down a hall filled with a bunch of zombie like people that will attack her everytime she get near them. The girl would simply shoot them down. Homura now has to find another way to restore her voice.

...

Notes* Sorry for taking so long in this. I know it seems redundant, but I had school and finals. I'm also starting to run out of ideas. I might make a part 2 or something later, and before that I would make other stories. For now, expect a hiatus or the story going to end soon.

The story would come back, just not as quickly and yes I know that this chapter is shorter than the other chapters.

I thought that I can be creative with this, but alas, I thought wrong.


	5. Chapter 5

The Goddess and Me

Chapter 5

Season Finale

I always wanted a Pokemon for a pet so I decided to ask Madoka for one during lunch time.

Me: Hey, Madoka, Madoka. Hey

Madoka: Yes.

Me: Can I have a Pokemon?

The goddess glared at me. It wasn't a mean one though mostly a worried one. She looked at me as if it might be a bad idea.

Madoka: Are you sure? It would cause a lot of attention.

Me: Nobody cares unless I show it to them. Remember how I summoned you.

The goddess try to remember and notice that no one cares in this school no matter how important or super natural. This made the goddess sigh.

Madoka: Fine, but you have to take good care of it.

Me: Of course I will. I'm not that stupid.

Madoka: Okay, which pokemon you want?

Me: A Charmander.

Madoka paused a bit: A Charmander?

Me: Yeah, the orange lizard thing with a flame on its tail.

Madoka: Don't you mean Hitokage?

Me: What's that?

Madoka: The thing you said.

Me: No, I meant Charmander.

Madoka: I could have swore you meant Hitokage.

Stan the Janitor: Hitokage is the Japanese name for Charmander!

The Janitor came so suddenly. We both freaked out a bit.

Stan: By the way toots, your school uniform doesn't even match the school colors.

The man left.

Me: Shouldn't you have seen that coming?

Madoka: As I said before, sometimes I don't even try look at certain points in the future like when will you go to the restroom which is probably at 7:22.

Me: So are you going to bring out the Charmander or what?

Madoka: Fine, but I hope that you won't pull of something stupid later.

And then suddenly a Charamander appeared thanks to Madoka. The lizard looked at the both of us and it said its name. Madoka was happy and said.

Madoka: KAWAII!

No one even cared to look at the lizard, except some of my friends. Pedro, the guy who helped me summon Madoka came and said.

Pedro: This is not natural at all!

Me: Fsh, who cares. I finally have a real life pokemon!

I gave Charmander a hug and it blew fire at both me and Madoka's face. Due to pokemon logic, we still live.

Me: I think he loves me.

Madoka: I hope that you know what your doing.

And so me and my Charmander danced through the rainbows and the flowers when we did have the time. The lizard ends up burning everything, but who cares, we are having fun. Also a really dumb song is playing in the background.

During class, the fire alarm rang and it might have been from Charamander. I pointed at someone in class who so happens to be smoking weed and I got away with it.

I had a bunch of scientist in my front door and I don't want to deal with their bull shit so I brought out my Charmander and he burns them with ember.

Charmander than evolved into a Charmeleon.

Madoka: Its not so cute anymore.

Charmeleon gave the middle finger at the goddess and starts smoking some Pocky, literally the biscuit. He lit up the snack with his tail and the chocolate started to melt.

Me: Charmeleon, you can't smoke that in the house, without me!

And so the both of us got stoned together as friends. Madoka had enough and left. She could have used her powers to end this, but it was beyond her control and it would be messed up to do so.

Madoka: I sometimes wonder how this boy thinks. Even my own powers of looking into the future could not handle this.

After more houses burn and started to battle people, my Charmeleon evolved to a Charizard. We flew in the sky and started to burn some planes off the air and got the military against us. Charizard and I used the power of friendship and kill those motha-f*%#ers.

Madoka saw all of this and had enough. She used her powers to create a Greninja so that she can stop this once and for all.

Madoka: ERIK! I really don't want to do this, but I must stop you. You and your Lizardon have been a bother to me for too long.

Me: What could me and my Charizard do to anyone?

A flashback occured with my Charizard and I making prank calls to Madoka using the same joke over and over again with the goddess face palming herself and leave.

Madoka: Now I choose you, Gekkouga.

Me: Oh hey its a Greninja.

Madoka: Um, sorry, but its a Gekkouga.

Stan the Janitor: Gekkouga is the Japanese name for Greninja. I just like spouting exposition.

The janitor that appeared out of nowhere just left and we both begin our battle.

Madoka: Gekkouga, use hydropump!

The ninja poke used the move and it really hurt my Charizard so badly.

Me: Time to Megaevolve to Charizard XY.

Madoka: There's no such thing.

Me: I made it happen, its my fan fiction after all.

Charizard then changed a bit, an annoying voice spouted.

Charizard: Charizard digivolve to Charizard XYmon.

Madoka: The heck. We're ripping off Digimon too.

The dragon has his right side be like his X form while his left side is like his Y form. If you don't know what I'm talking about then look it up on Google.

Me: Charizard, use FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC NO JUTSU!

The dragon then shot a laser beam that kill the Greninja and blasted Madoka away. The goddess trembled and looked at me. After all of this crap, I decided one thing that I have to do.

Me: Charizard, buddy. I know we been through good times, but I have to let you go. Our battle today made me realize that you deserve independence. Good bye old friend.

The pokemon gave me a hug and flew off.

Me: You can visit me anytime you want just I'm not busy.

The dragon still in his evolved form flew into the clouds. Madoka got to me and looked sorry.

Madoka: Erik, after all we been through, I admit that your a pain. I have been going out of character lately because I just feel unconfortable with you, but I realize that your just you and you have the right to be yourself. At least you have a good heart.

Me: Thanks.

Madoka: No problem. Also, I'm sorry that I can be inconsistant with my abilities. I'm still learning how to use them properly to be honest. I might be a goddess, but I'm still a rookie compare to Zeus.

Me: What's done is done? I guess this is it for our season one and the writer is going on anothe hiatus after this chapter.

Madoka: Yep, and we completely didn't go in much detail about the illuminati coming after us.

Me: Huh.

Suddenly a bunch of internet memes started flying around us and there was a lot of noises and screaming.

...

Meanwhile Homura finally got her voice back with the help of Doctor Who.

Homura: Thank you Doctor for the help. I never met someone who has been really helpful.

Doctor Who: I'm not a trained medical doctor.

Homura: You still did a great job nevertheless.

Doctor Who: Right.

The Raven haired girl left the tardis and suddenly felt a terrible feeling in her. It must be that Madoka is in trouble. She ran quickly and screamed.

Homura: Homu Homu.

...

End of Season One...

Notes: Finally done with this chapter. Sorry again if this story is really rushed and a bit crappy. I know my writing is sloppy in this one, but its just that I wasn't interested in writing this anymore. I just hope in the future, I can get more ideas.

Season 2 would probably be out soon.


	6. Chapter 6

The Goddess and Me Finale: 2mlg4me

_I'm going to end what I started. After a long hiatus, just adding a new chapter despite the fact that I ended the story a while ago. Consider this as a season 2. Well enjoy._

Madoka and I were attack by sponsorships. I decided to get out my gun and shoot everything. Madoka was surprised that I even had one to begin with.

Madoka: Where did you get that?

Me: From you remember.

Madoka: Oh, I kind of remembered now.

Me: Well stop being a dumbass in distress and rekt these mofos.

So Madoka got out her arrows and I just kept shooting. It was like a swarm of bees buzzing at us. We just kept shooting at them until we left the area. We decided that the best place to hide is in my house.

Madoka: This is going to sound stupid, but we need to get to the Illuminati building in Irvine.

Me: Count me in.

Madoka: Wait, I'm a freaking goddess. I could just blow up that s#$ .

With a snap of her fingers, the whole MLG nonsense is gone. Madoka wiped her forehead ad I was a bit disappointed. This was my time to be bad ass. Suddenly the door opened revealing to be Homura. She walked towards us and said.

Homura: I finally get to see you again. HOMU HOMU!

Madoka: Homura-chan?

Homura lunged herself to Madoka and hugged her with all her might. Madoka was losing air and I had to help free her. The suddenly a spaceship crashed my house and destroyed most of it. It then revealed Sayaka.

Sayaka: Madoka! I finally made it.

Madoka: Took you long enough.

Me: Wait, your leaving this quickly. We barely started this chapter.

Madoka: After being in this failed fan fiction, we seriously need to end it.

Me: Okay I agree. Kind of want to be done with this crap now.

Madoka: So long Erik, and I'll see you in heaven soon Homura-chan. Being a goddess kind of prevents me from seeing you. I'm terribly sorry.

Homura: Madoka! Please take me with you!

Madoka and Sayaka left in their space ship and my house repaired itself. I looked at Homura who just stands there. She looked kind of dead after seeing Madoka ditch her for godly reasons possible. Then I decided to tell her...

Me: Get the f#$% out of my house.

Homura left and said the parting words: Homu Homu.

The end.

Notes* I'm finally finished.


End file.
